


Cold Blooded

by lmao_wyld



Category: Grey's Anatomy
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Drowning, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Season/Series 03
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-04
Updated: 2018-10-05
Packaged: 2019-07-24 21:31:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16183577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lmao_wyld/pseuds/lmao_wyld
Summary: Meredith Grey is drowning. She is drowning, and she isn’t fighting. She’s drowning in more ways than the most obvious. Maybe she deserves to.





	1. Bitter Song

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Drowning deeper and deeper until one can no longer make sense of what’s around them really puts life in perspective.

Meredith Grey was drowning. She was drowning, and she wasn’t fighting. It’s too cold, she reasoned. Or, she doesn’t even know which way is up. Either way, there was no way she was going to make it to the surface, so why bother?

Maybe, just maybe.. She wanted out. Out of her responsibilities, out of her failing relationship, out of her life. She wasn’t extraordinary, she was just Meredith Grey; the product of a shit mother who just so happened to be an exemplary example of a surgeon.

Meredith didn’t want to pretend anymore. She wanted out. Maybe she didn’t love Derek. Maybe she didn’t want to face the consequences. But at least she wouldn’t have to, now that she’s trailing deeper, deeper, deeper, in the depths of the bay. The water was cold. Paralyzingly cold. She closed her eyes, and stopped fighting. She closed her eyes and let go.

And then, sounds were filling what used to be dead space. What used to be comfortable silence was now a physical form of a pounding headache.

“Your brain works.” She couldn’t figure out who was saying that, but they were determined.

“Ouch,” was all she could muster. And then her eyes fluttered open to see— Addison Montgomery? Why was Dr. Addison Montgomery, the ex-wife of the man Meredith practically stole right from under her feet, looming over the dirty mistress, as she was so commonly referred?

The Ruler Of All That Is Evil was smiling at her. A real, actual smile that showed no hidden agenda. Blue eyes that seemed warm and inviting, not cold and callous like all the other times they interacted. All Meredith could do was stare at the red-headed woman, baffled. Flabbergasted, even. “Meredith, can you hear me? Do you know where you are?” She nodded, almost hesitantly. “You gave all of us a scare.” Addison stared at Meredith intently, but looked away after a moment. “Alright, well.. Your vitals are.. Good, they’re good. Considering. I should go.” As the neo-natal surgeon was turning to leave, Meredith reached out and grabbed at her arm, causing her to stop. Addison bowed her head and didn’t look at the smaller, fragile woman. She couldn’t bear to. “You’re- you’re fine, Meredith. I’ll check on— I’ll have someone check on you later.”

And she was gone. Now Meredith was alone, left to her thoughts and feelings or whatever. Was she actually dead, or did Addison Montgomery treat her with an ounce of decency? That was a problem for tomorrow, Meredith reasoned. For now, she deserved to rest.

“I’m getting married to Burke,” disrupted her sleep. “You’re.. The one person I wanted to tell.” Her eyes opened to see a tear-stricken Cristina Yang; her best friend, her soulmate, her person. “Thank you for not dying.”

Meredith was able to produce a smile, albeit small. “I’m proud of you. Happy for you. Who knew that you’d get married before me? Or at all?” She let out a laugh that turned into a cough, and Cristina leaned her up so she could breath.

“I know, right? Easy does it, Mer. I don’t want you dying after all the effort we put in keeping you alive.”

Meredith nodded slowly, taking slow breaths once her coughing fit let up. “Cristina?” The brown eyed surgeon looked at her, nodding. “Where’s Derek?”

Yang paused, avoiding eye contact. “He’s, uh.. He’s gone, Mer. He left-“ Tears welled in Meredith’s eyes- “he said he couldn’t.. Take it. Kept saying you were a good swimmer and that.. You deliberately-“

“Stop!” she cried out, burying her face in her thin, pale hands. The veins seemed to stick out more, being more noticeable. 

Cristina stared. “Sorry.. If it’s any consolation, Addison gave him a lot to remember her by.”

“A damn parting gift? Sex?”

“No! No, god, sorry. She slapped him pretty hard. It was quite a sight,” Cristina chuckled, almost dimly. “It was less than what I wanted to do, but George and Iz, they.. They had to basically restrain me. I think someone sedated me, I don’t know. I was so mad, Mer-“

“Cristina?”

“Yeah?”

“You’re rambling.”

“Sorry.”


	2. Freak Me Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Addison finally pays Meredith a visit after the accident.

A steady rhythm, but a broken melody. That’s what plagued Meredith Grey’s mind every damn day she was trapped in that hospital bed. Sure, Cristina made the rounds to see her, as did George, Izzie, even Alex fucking Karev. But Meredith was numb. Numb to the fact that she survived a sort of suicide attempt. Numb to the fact that her boyfriend left her. Numb to the fact that she didn’t miss him. Numb to the fact that she missed Addison Montgomery.

Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery, who had been the one to rescue her from the bottom of the ocean, she had heard from various visitors. She heard the entire thing, actually, and it was terrifying.

Apparantly Addison saw the little girl that Meredith had been escorting around the accident scene all alone. She was suspicious, it was said. After all, Meredith wouldn’t leave a little girl to fend for herself, would she? No. Not in the slightest. The little girl, all she could do was point at the water. So Addison, against all her better judgement, found someone to watch the girl and dove into the water. She fought the cold, because somewhere there was a Meredith Grey who couldn’t fight the cold.

Even through all that mess, what with Addison performing CPR the entire way to the hospital, doing everything she could to keep Meredith alive.. Still no visit, leaving the intern confused at best. Flustered at worst.

But then, she showed up. “About damn time, Montgomery,” Meredith spat before she could stop herself. “I mean, I-I.. I sit here for days, waiting for an answer to why you.. Risked everything for me. Me! You hate me!” Addison stared at Meredith, then looked down at her clipboard, presumably holding the intern’s charts. She flipped through several pages. “Hey! I’m talking to you!”

Addison sighed, turning to place the chart on a table nearby. She then looked at Meredith. “You’re being discharged today.”

“Why are you the one telling me?” The older woman paused, staring at Meredith for the umpteenth time. “Well?”

“You’re my patient.”

Meredith rolled her eyes. “What, because you saved me? Yeah, thanks for that. It wasn’t necessary, really. I can swim. I’m a good swimmer.”

“Meredith, shut up for a second. Please. You are my patient because when I found you, you were pregnant. Only a few weeks, but you miscarried. Dr. Bailey wanted me to tell you when you were well enough to leave, and.. You’re well enough to leave. Now, about the ‘good swimmer’ part?” Addison sat down on a roller chair nearby, scooting closer. “You were at the bottom of the bay, blue as the water itself. You wanna explain that to me? I had to fight just to get Psych to leave you alone. Was I wrong, Meredith?”

“I don’t know,” she croaked, tears already streaking down her face. “I swam. I fought, hard. I did.”

Dr. Montgomery placed her hand on Meredith’s shoulder. “I know you did. It was cold. I felt it. Go home, Meredith. Get some rest. Come back when you’re ready.” The attending stood, headed to leave.

Just as Addison reached the door, “Wait.” She stopped. “Have you heard from Derek? Is he really gone?”

“Yeah, Meredith. He.. I’m- I’m sorry. He moved back to New York. Took our brownstone,” she let out a sad laugh. When she was all set to leave the room, Meredith’s choked sobs convinced her to stay. Without hesitation, Addison slid into Mer’s bed, wrapping her arms around her; she had known this pain before. When Derek felt like he had been betrayed, his fight or flight kicked in, and he was known to flee. He flew when he caught Addison in bed with Mark, and he flew when Meredith was sinking in the bay. So, yeah, Addison knew this pain better than anyone.

Although it seemed like an eternity, Meredith did eventually calm down some. Maybe it was due to the unexpected warm feelings rising in her chest, making her heart beat ever so faster. Maybe she was just too nervous about Addison’s behavior to worry about Derek. After all, Derek was long gone, while Addison was here, right now, in the present, cause all sorts of inner turmoil to boil through Mer’s head. “Don’t go,” she murmured, breaking the deafening silence.

“I won’t,” was whispered back, a warm hand rubbing the intern’s shoulder, comfortingly. “I won’t.”


End file.
